I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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