i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize