Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Randomize