im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
