My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
