I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Randomize
