her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
