I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
