Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
