Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
