Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
