Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Randomize
