butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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