You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
