I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
zippers are such a cool invention
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize