why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize