Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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