so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
