In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Found the puke drawer
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
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