All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
