Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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