her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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