And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
