Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
