dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
