The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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