nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
