He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
