Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
