It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I just had sex on a roof
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize