drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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