People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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