i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I checked into jail on foursquare
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
