But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
