i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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