It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
