Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
