Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
soo... how was my night?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
