i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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