you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
