I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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