I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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