Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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