sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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