belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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