this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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