I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
