I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
