Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
