bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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